Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Alphonse Side

Gentlemen, please piece together and memorize an ALPHONSE speech from page 21 (typed below) or a NICKY monologue from page 63 (check the typed sides available on the APO table across from the callboard).
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ALPHONSE: Schtill dere, as far as I know. You vant a look, cuties?

FANNY: You, sir, are growing impertinent.

ALPHONSE: Zay, dat’s a nice vig you got dere. Mein zitxer has a vig like dat.

FANNY: Does she enjoy it?

ALPHONSE: She lofs it! A lot!

MARY: How do we locate your dirigible?

ALPHONSE: Follow der yellow brick road, shveeties.

MARY: Sorry?

ALPHONSE: Take der segund egxit. Vatch for der Burma Shave signs. Oh, buoy. I should never had taken dat extra schlice of date bread. Never eat on a full schtomach.

MARY: Alphonse—

APLHONSE: Egxcuze me, ladies. Zank you for der chow. You must come to eat viz me shomeday. I make a mean manioc strudel.

ALEX: Manioc, my favorite.

FANNY: Have ou ever had manioc fritters?

ALPHONSE: Ve vill haf to trade recipes.

MARY: Alphonse, couldn’t you see your way clear to guide us to the dirigible? We’ll pay wages.

ALPHONSE: Zorry. I am not vell. I haf to get zis Alphonse out of mein zyztem. Perhaps ve meet again, mein blue angels. Vaya con Dios!

MARY: Auf wiedersehn.

ALPHONSE: (He hands FANNY a bundle.) A token of mein steam. Big juju. Lof dat vig. (He exits.)

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